Dad jokes
One-Liners
20 jokes, all of them clean.
- I would tell you a construction joke, but I'm still working on it.
- Want to hear a joke about paper? Never mind, it's tearable.
- 6:30 is the best time on a clock, hands down.
- What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet? "Supplies!"
- I ordered a chicken and an egg online. I'll let you know which comes first.
- Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field.
- I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. It's impossible to put down.
- What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Nacho cheese.
- My therapist says I have a preoccupation with revenge. We'll see about that.
- I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised.
- Parallel lines have so much in common. It's a shame they'll never meet.
- What's brown and sticky? A stick.
- Why did the bicycle fall over? It was two-tired.
- I stayed up all night wondering where the sun went. Then it dawned on me.
- I used to play piano by ear, but now I use my hands.
- Did you hear about the guy who invented Lifesavers? He made a mint.
- Why don't skeletons fight each other? They don't have the guts.
- I only know 25 letters of the alphabet. I don't know y.
- What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh.
- I used to hate facial hair, but then it grew on me.
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